better luck next time

Back from the Cape, now its off to Maine. I hope everyone is enjoying the end of the year, and lets hope that 2002 is a better year for the world. Here are some suggestions for resolutions that you could make for a more peaceful planet.

Resolve to:
1. vote in every election you can, and do the homework to find out who is a worthy candidate (if no one is, write in someone!)
2. volunteer in your community
3. use human powered transportation whenever possible (the less petroleum we use, the fewer wars we'll get into)
4. take time to stop and smell the cosmos
5. love someone
6. learn stuff (keep that old brain busy)
7. express yourself (be nice now!)
8. plant something and watch it grow
9. celebrate diversity (don't be ashamed to be different, or shame others who are different from you, unless they are greedy assholes, of course :)
10. And no matter what you resolve, make sure to spend as much time as possible enjoying life!

Now, everyone have a happy New Year! I'll be celebrating with a bunch of hippy christian musicians and my mom. Pretty funny, huh? But they are all very cool people, and I can't think of too many other people I would want to spend the holiday with. So I'll have fun. See you next year...

screech

My (errrch) roommate (screeeech) is (errrrrreee) learning (errrrch) play the (eewwweeeich) violin. (Errrreeeereuuuuchh.)

Hopefully, he won't want to bring it to the solstice party... :)

Hey, happy solstice! (I can't stress that enough.)

happy solstice!

If you listen carefully
in the stillness of the night
you can hear peace.
Remember that sound, when dawn breaks
and bring it into your day.

I should have thought of that

Another Google search that brought the masses (well one of them, anyway) here was "sticker god bless whole world". Cute. I don't have one of those, but I do have an "America bless Goddess" one. And you can always get a whole pile of stickers, with whatever saying you desire, custom-made at either Unamerican Activities or The Sticker Guy.

didn't people used to die of consumption?

I went to a forum with Juliet Schor, a Harvard/BC sociologist, and writer of the book "The Overworked American". Her latest tome (actually it's pretty darn slim, more like a big zine, really) is about America's obsession with overconsumption. The best sound bite of the evening was: "More people filed for bankruptcy this year than graduated from college". Other than that it was a fairly dull talk. But, there were a few folks in attendence who hadn't already heard the news about how badly we're screwing ourselves, our kids, and our planet. They seemed to get something out of her speech.

As for the future politicalization of yours truly, last night I attended what had to be the shortest political meeting ever. This was the Committee Committee (no shit, there is one!), and they were there to vote on the appointments for the Mayor's bike committee. The three guys (yep, all men) sat down and immediately made a motion to approve all of us. One gentleman pointed out that, at least, the appointees names needed to be read off, for the record. He did so, mangled my name profoundly, to which I responded by spelling my name for the clerk, for the record. Then someone seconded the motion, and thirded (?) it, and it was a done deal. Tomorrow, I get to be sworn in by the mayor. I'm just hoping that she doesn't make me agree to asking for some god dude's help. If anyone has any humorous, nonoffensive, but serious retort to officials asking you to swear "so help me god", let me know asap...

Last note of the evening: Out of curiosity I got a little site meter (the little rubik's cubey thing up there), and discovered my suspicions were almost entirely right, two of you (maybe three) are, occasionally, reading my journal. Hey guys! On the otherhand, I did get a couple of entirely random people from odd searches on Google. One from a search for WTO stuff (I put a link up to the virtual sit-in a few weeks ago), and the other for the McCain-Feingold Bill (which I mentioned in the Granny D. commentary). Funny. I wonder how far down those people dug to get to my site?

punk crafts: take two

So, you didn't make it to the Bizarre Bazaar? Well fear not, you can still get diy/punk crafts online! (Or just look at the stuff to get ideas, and make it yourself, like I'm doing.) My favorite is the punk sock monkey.

While I'm in the mood, here's a quick diy craft gift idea for you: A vinyl LP candy dish.

You'll need an unwanted 12" record (for you youngins, that's a vinyl disc with a little hole in the center) and an empty tin can, an oven, and, preferably, a cookie sheet. Put the can on the cookie sheet, with the closed end up. Then put the record on top of the can. (It's a can sandwich!) Make sure that the can only touches the paper label on the record (so that the vinyl doesn't stick to the metal). Then bake the whole thing for about 5 minutes at a medium temperature (try 300° F). Keep an eye on the record, and watch it melt. When it's all nice and droopy, take it out. It will be a funky, wiggly shape. While the vinyl is still hot, you can carefully mold it, if the shape isn't quite even. Obviously, wear some kind of oven mit or something while handling it (you'll want to save your fingers for later activities, I'd imagine). Let the bowl cool, and voila! You've got a pretty spiffy, and very punk, candy dish for your coffeetable. You could also use it to put keys in, or jewelry, (unused) condoms, or any other random small items. Be creative!

If you want to make the bowl suitable for other, messier, items like chips or dip, you can try your hand at filling the bottom with clear acrylic stuff (make sure to temporarily seal the bottom of the hole with some masking tape, first). This stuff is available at craft stores, but I warn you, it's messy to work with.

Wheee!

This excellent web site has a similar idea, and the directions are more elaborate. Plus, there is a picture!

gender bias

It occured to me that my little mini-rant about older people dating teenagers was completely heterosexually biased. Sorry if I offended anyone. I'm ususally one of the most pro-queer straight folks out there. But when it comes to ruminations on love, I tend to forget about other people's preferences. But the advice still stands for same sex relationships. Honest, lasting love is all about equality. And there's just no way a mature adult can escape the tendency to feel superior to a teenager. And that's true no matter what gender you're doing the hanky panky with.

Speaking of kids. I just happened to catch a few minutes of the kid's show "Blues' Clues". It's pretty darn cool. Most tv shows out there are crap but, occasionally, someone does it right.

punk rock crafts

I have now seen it all. Somerville's first annual Bizarre Bazaar was held tonight. It was a holiday craft show by and for the punk/DIY set. Wallets made out of duct tape, and only duct tape. S&M whips made out of bicycle parts. (Hey, that was MY idea!) Beautiful stained glass ornaments made out of old (real) monkey brain slides, from an abandoned research facility. And plenty of zines. Fun stuff. And, for someone who is not at all a punk (though I was such a wannabe in college) I certainly knew a lot of the people there. My favorite is Jef Czekaj. He does the comic "R2D2 is an indy rocker" and plays in several bands with one of my old roommates. He's also got a strip in Nikelodeon's magazine. (How did a punk get into a mainstream kids' magazine?!) The fact that he not only remembers me from a couple of years ago, but that he also complimented me on my letter in the Phoenix, certainly makes him cool in my book. :)

Surprisingly, the other Jef (the EVEN COOLER one!) didn't know about this event, even though the store where he works, Flyrabbit, was selling stuff there. Sucks to be him.

I had about an hour to kill before the Bazaar opened, so I stopped into the Davis Square Goodwill, nearby. I came out with some of the coolest thrift scores ever. A working orange juicer from the 50's, a zen chime box that usually costs upwards of $50 in fancy schmancy museum shops but that cost me only a buck, and of course, another bike. No, I did not need another bike. But it was five bucks. And it's in nearly working order. It's got one of those super cushy, spring loaded seats and I just couldn't resist. It's an addiction, I know.

PS. I noticed that I mispelled Windoze wrong in my earlier post. But I left it "Wondoze", since it has even more of an ironicality to it that way. It was a Freudian slip that happened again just now. Maybe my brain just can't grasp the concept that a Microsoft product has the word "win" in it. or maybe it's just because the "i" and the "o" are right next to eachother on the keyboard.

I have a deckled edge

Quiet week. Only one committee related meeting, which was attended by not one, but two 20-something jock-townie guys from the Massachusetts government. You just KNEW that they drove SUV's with little American flags attached to their antennas. They were entertaining, if nothing else.

I found out that my Dad and Stepmother are ditching the family for Christmas this year. They've been planning a vacation for months now, but had neglected to mention it to me... I've realized that I'm just not a big priority in their lives. They love me and all, but I think that they would be perfectly happy if they saw me once or twice a year. Fortunately, my mom can never get enough of me!

Found out at work that they are really, really serious about forcing us to work on Wondoze machines, against all reason and common sense. PC's are ok if you just want to type letters and numbers on a screen, but ask it to deal with postscript fonts, graphics, or open an undefined document and the things just get all panic attacky. So, I'm looking very seriously for another job. (The CPPAX thing fell through. Too many applicants, and I was overqualified.) In the meantime my coworkers and I have decided that they need to give us raises Combat pay, if you will, for having to deal with an irrational operating system.

On a final note, a roommate bumped into the Jason a few days ago and reported back to me. Apparently, the the woman who he was waxing poetic about (immediately after he dumped me and vehemently claimed that he was not at all interested in being in a relationship), dumped him. And it turns out that she was 19 years old. 19!

Here's some advice for you men out there: If you are still dating teenagers when you're 30 (or even 29, 28, 27...), you are clearly not interested in a serious relationship. You should just go out and get a prostitute, and save everyone a headache. (Just remember to wear those condoms!) The same advice goes for older women, except that chances are slim that the kid is gonna have any feelings for you, beyond those in his dick, so he's probably not going to be too bothered when you decide to ditch him.

my fifteen minutes

Boston area readers can check out yours truly in an article in the City Section of the Boston Globe. And, I was right, the reporter did make note of my keen bicycling fashion sense. Unfortunately there is no photo to go along with the article. Though, there is another article a couple of pages away that has a great picture of a local mother and ALL three of her kids on a bike, as well as a guest, too. They've rigged up a sort of scoop thing on the front of the bike which holds the smaller kids and a trail-a-bike on the back for the older one. (Sorry, no link. The Globe website doesn't seem to have this one online.) This family was on my Rolling Blackout bike ride. They are cool people.

Also, if you are in the Boston area, check out the show at the Oni Gallery in Chinatown. It's hard to find, but it's worth it. The show that is going on for the next few weeks is a collection of engineering art worthy of Rube Goldberg. The show was organized by Dana Moser, who teaches in the Studio for Interrelated Media, the coolest department at MassArt. Check out the web site for his class on Computer-Controlled Media.

couch party

While trying to follow the critical mass group to the Couch Guy's party, I managed to loose everyone. I had to go all the way home and get the address. When I looked at the map, I almost decided to forego the party, because it was located in an area of Somerville which is nearly impossible to get to. It's one of those places where, because of some really insane urban planning, you can see where you want to go but just can't get there. But, I was determined to have some fun, so I hopped back on my bike and ventured out into no-woman's land. I did eventually find the place, and even had a little fun. Immediately, upon passing the doorstep, a bowl of Borscht was thrust into my hands, and, yet another person said "so THIS is Turil!". It was also refreshing to be at a party where getting plastered was not the goal. And, I was hit on by yet another geeky older gentleman. I think I've hit a personal best this week. Sadly, none of these guys is quite the turtle-type, though they all are very nice.

After the party, I came home to find all of my roommates hanging out, eating chocolate, and singing acoustic guitar versions of Pokemon songs. I love my roommies.

overqualified

So I just got a call (at 9pm!) from this organization that has a pretty cool job opening. It's an office manager/outreach coordinator for a progressive political action organization called CPPAX. A very unfortunate acronym, in my opinion. It conjures up visions of some over hyped sci-fi flick being remade by everyone's favorite sappy Christian television network, with Kevin Spacey turning out to be an angel instead... Anyway, the CPPAX woman was essentially conducting interviews over the phone, and I think I did alright. But she said that she was afraid that the position was beneath me. I reiterated to her that I feel that the most important aspect of a job is the people and the ideals of the organization, and that the actual everyday tasks are less of an issue for me. Hopefully she bought it. I really wanted to add that they were offering a higher salary then I'm currently earning. But it didn't seem entirely appropriate. We'll just have to see what happens.

In similar news, I spent the entire workday trying to cajole some html into looking the way I wanted it to. I compromised, and let it do what it wanted in the middle bit, while I forced it to do my bidding on the top and bottom. Hey, if they wanted a webmaster, they should hire one, and not borrow the graphic designer/art goddess. But I kind of had fun.

A random heads up. Home Movies, a part of the Cartoon Network's Adult Swim evening, is a really spiffy show.

Tuesday night was MassBike's annual Bike Night, and I did the tabling thing. It was fun and I even got to accept an award for the Somerville Bicycle Committee. I was interviewed for the Boston Globe, and the interviewer was most impressed with my ability to combine bike riding with a great fashion style. I told her that stretch velvet was the key. I also think that the couch guy himself was hitting on me. Life is funny.

the smallness of the world always amazes me

I've had an ad on a local personals website for years now, and I occasionally get responses from it. Even more occasionally I'll get responses from people I know. Yesterday, I got a response from one of my best friends from college. Apparently he didn't entirely recognise me from my picture or my description. Weird.

All during college this guy was dating one of my other best friends, and after we all graduated, they got married. Then they got a divorce. I haven't talked to either of them in almost a decade. (We had a bit of a falling out, having to do with a poisoned cat, which was probably an accident, but everyone seemed to be a little suspicious...) Now this guy is e-mailing me all over the place and it's just a little creepy. I do like him, and I always did have a half a crush on him way back when. But to go out with my best friend's ex just seems wrong. I don't know what I'd do if he wanted to do anything more than hang out.

On an entirely different note... Next Tuesday, I officially get inducted into the Somerville city government. Wheee! I guess that makes me some kind of politician. Do you think I'll suddenly become afflicted with a serious case of greed and incompetence? Tune in next week to find out.

who, exactly, voted for this man?

This is one of the most astounding things I've ever read. Our very own president, the leader of the so-called free world, the man that the citizens of our country (sort of) voted into the most powerful position in the government, actually said the following, out loud, and within full view of the press:

"If this were a dictatorship, it would be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator."

(Sure, it was a while back, and he seemed to think that he was making a funny. But jeez, the man is just so clearly an imbecile. He probably makes jokes about bombs in airports, too. What's scary, is not that he's a world class idiot, but that around 25% of our country honestly seemed to think that he's the guy they wanted in charge. Who are these people, and what is in their drinking water?)

errant hydrogen

This one is in competition for best news headline ever: Gas from sun heads in wrong direction. See the whole article here. The article is less amusing than the headline indicates. Though you'd almost swear that it was written by those wacky folks at the Onion, even though it's actually from CNN.

You know, if the sun doesn't watch out, little Bushie might have it arested for being unpatriotic or something. (You knew I had to sneak some sort of political nonsense in there didn't you?)

So, anyway, happy Thanksgiving to you all. Hope it's a warm and friendly one for everyone. (Thank heavens my rich, republican aunt and uncle are going to be elsewhere for this one...)

sorry, there is no miricle pill

I just found the most succinct article about the liberal position on "Operation Enduring Freedom". It not only offers alternatives to bombing innocent, starving people but it has analogies too. And analogies are cool.

Oh, and for any of you who may have seen the ongoing discussion I started with my letter to the editor in the Boston Phoenix, here is a link to the World Court (actually called the International Court of Justice) where it discusses the court's findings incriminating the US government in acts of terrorism. Here is just one of the sixteen findings:

(3) By twelve votes to three,
Decides that the United States of America, by training, arming, equipping, financing and supplying the contra forces or otherwise encouraging, supporting and aiding military and paramilitary activities in and against Nicaragua, has acted, against the Republic of Nicaragua, in breach of its obligation under customary international law not to intervene in the affairs of another State

This is the primary reason that the US refuses to sign onto the World Court. If we did, we would have to abide by it's law, and that would mean that we would have to be held responsible for our actions. And, as we all know, that is something that politicians are loathe to do.

One final amusing, yet horrifying, tidbit of information. The CIA published a clip art filled manual on terrorism to hand out to potential rabble rousers in Nicaragua. I was going to provide a link, but the site has suspiciously disappeared. Hmmmmm.... But here is a link for a much less entertaining version without the clip art. I'll keep looking for another link for the cartoon version. It really is quite amazing.

drugstore gift suggestion

This made me crack up. I've got my period and I was in my local drugstore picking up some pads. I couldn't help but notice the "Makes a great stocking stuffer!" signs stuck all over the menstrual products' shelves. Is this sarcasm, or are they really trying to convince people that maxi pads are cool? Maybe they're slated to become the next fad, like pet rocks and American flags on SUVs. Needless to say, I bought two cases, and you can now all expect woven sacks, with a box of maxi pads inside, as presents.

(Now THAT was definitely sarcasm.)

quiet

For the first time a a very long time I had a lazy, quiet weekend. I decided to let the political world do it's own thing, while I started thinking about the holiday season. I'm a big fan of the whole Thanksgiving/Solstice/New Years season. I get to see my families, make lots of cool gifts, and eat warm, homemade food. Pumpkin pie, alone, is worth having to deal with the onslaught of annoying, jangly Christmas songs and mindless, rabid consumers clogging up the aisles.

Every year I do crafts for a solid month, in preparation for gift giving. There are usually two or three different items which I concentrate on. This year, I'm starting with weaving. I got some yarn at the Goodwill on Saturday and I've been weaving my brain out ever since. Those of you on my gift list can look forward to woven items this year. Aren't you excited? (Hey.... watch it. Or you might just end up with a woven sack of coal!)

On a similar subject, don't forget that this Friday is Buy Nothing Day. I like to promote it as a day to share something with someone, or to make your own gifts. Instead of going to a mall and subjecting yourself to the madness, save your cash. Stay home and teach a friend how to knit. Or make your own holiday cards by carving a potato and using it as a printing block like you did in kindergarden. Or go on a treasure hunt in the woods for pinecones and branches that you can use to decorate with (bonus points if you can find a chestnut tree and chestnuts to roast). Or (I really love this one) make origami with your money. Whatever you decide to do, don't spend the day giving your money to someone who already has more of it than they could ever use in a lifetime. And, remember to have fun. That's the important thing.

me

A search for my name (Turil) on Google provided a good half an hour of entertaining links. I had no idea that I was a bus company in Uruguay. Also, I am quite popular in the sci-fi/fantasy/roll-playing genre. One particular description of Turil worked nicely for me (actually, it seems so strikingly similar to me, that I'm wondering if it was written by someone I know...). The gist of this Goddess is that she's responsible for inspiration, art, and creativity. Cool. There were also a few writers in this genre who seemed to think that I was male. They're just a little confused...

you're never too old to be a hero

Let's see. The Nader rally was good. Nothing earth shattering. But good. The place was packed, mostly with college age kids. Though there were a few older people, most notibly an 80 year old WWII veteran who sat next to me for a while and told me his life story, as well as his theory that the US was screwing up once again. There was also an older woman, probably in her 60's, who had a nifty moon goddess sort of costume on and was waving an America flag that had a "Be all that you can be: work for peace" sticker on it. She danced through the isles all night and made people happy. And, of course, there's Granny D.

Granny D. is now 91 years old, and just a year ago she completed a walk across the country (3,400 miles or so) to raise awareness of corporate corruption in politics and to encourage the House of Representatives to pass the McCain Feigngold - clean elections - bill. (The bill did eventually pass in the House, but when it went back into the Senate, where it had already passed, it was essentially killed in a committee.) So Granny D. even after her huge adventure, and significant success, is still working harder than most corporate CEO's do in their entire lives.

On Sunday, Granny D. was awarded the Humanist of the Year award by the Boston Ethical Society. I went to the event, and got a chance to give her a copy of Dinkum Oil, which leads with her statement about the attacks of 9/11. She told me that she'd gotten into a lot of trouble for that statement. And then she reached up, patted me on the head, and exclaimed "Good for you!" What's so amazing about her is that she's not really amazing. She's just a regular person who cares, and isn't afraid of failure. Some people think that it's brave to point a machine gun (or missile launcher) at other people. I don't agree. I think what is really brave is to stand up against those people with the guns and say that you don't want to fight. Our country needs some more truly brave people. Actually, the whole world needs them.

While the rest of the US has it's head stuck up it's collective ass, and is wandering around muttering that it sucks but it's the way it's gotta be, I am off to join the few brave souls who want to try and pry those heads out. I'm dressed in my sexiest post-modern hippychick duds (baggy jeans, little black tank top with an even littler lacy purple camisole-thing on top) and I've got a messenger bag full of Dinkum Oil (that would be my zine, the name comes from the Australian slang term for "the truth"), and a pile of "peace is patriotic" stickers. I'm off to change the world. Wish me luck.

While I'm out there fighting the good fight (non-violently, of course), you can do some armchair activism by joining in a virtual sit-in over at the WTO (World Trade Organization), to demand that the priorities of human beings are placed before the priorities of big business.

plugged in luddite

As much as I was trying to avoid it, the inevetable happened. I've now got a cable modem. It was my roommates' idea. It took me three hours of troubleshooting on my own, and another hour-plus on the phone with a couple of people from RCN. That nasty 169.255... address kept wedging itself into my tcp/ip. But now I'm finally speeding along. Which is odd for a turtle. To be speeding, that is. I'm listening to a streaming techno station on MP3.com, and I already downloaded the new Episode II trailer. Aren't you impressed? Nah, me either.

So, the bad thing about the cable modem is that it took valuable time away from the important project. The zine is really, really, almost done now. And with the very visceral deadline of tomorrow (in time for the Nader thing on Saturday), I have to put aside my tendency to nitpick over little niggling details, like I usually do when it comes to art.

A thought occured to me today. If it is legal, in times of war, to kill people, even non-military civillains and diplomats and such, then would it be alright, legally, if someone (not me, of course) from God Bless America™ decided to off George Dubya? Does this war-exception extend to anyone, or do you have to align yourself with the opposition (opening yourself up to attack also)? It seems like there must be some provision to protect from this, but there could be some legal grounds for defense in such a case.

This all brings me to my final point of the evening. How is it that declaration of war suddenly makes murder AOK? A government can up and invade another country, kill as many people as it sees fit, demand obedience from the country's citizens, and implement its own form of government and officials. As long as its got the backing of a majority of the other coutries with the big guns, then its completely legal. What am I missing here? Sure, I can buy the defense argument. If someone rolls into my community waving around a big ole' tank and scaring the cats, I can accept that the National Guard is gonna come in and try to make the evil tank-people go away. But Nicaragua, Cuba, Vietnam? Those were completely unprovoked assaults on our part. Heck, even Afghanastan, since we still don't seem to have any proof who was behind the hijackings, except for a few Saudis and Indians with a death wish. How is it that we can ethically condemn "them" for killing people, when we are doing the same thing ourselves?

I'll leave you with that one to contemplate, while I go play with fonts...

Ani II?

My mother woke me up the other morning to tell me all about this musician she'd seen the night before. She told me that she really loved her, and that I probably would too. She mentioned that the musician was kinda like Ani DiFranco (yep, my mom is the coolest, isn't she?). So I go to check out the woman's web site and lo and behold, I realize that she's not KINDA like Ani Difranco, she's EXACTLY like Ani. It's creepy. Her name is Miranda Stone and the only thing that's noticably different about her is that she's apparently big into religion. But it doesn't seem to get in the way of her ability to write pretty cool songs. Check out her music here, and tell me someone hasn't been experimenting with cloning alternative folk guitarists...

So, while I'm sitting at work this afternoon, it strikes me that my employers have handed me an incredibly dangerous tool: website admin capabilities. It took me a week to realize that I now have the entire website in my hands, to do with as I wish. I'm generally not the sabotage type, but there is an awful lot of incentive to make a few subtle changes that reflect a more environmentally friendly agenda. Nothing that would actually cause any harm, of course, but maybe some subliminal messages about bicycling, or peace, or somesuch. A link that takes you to the Fish and the Bike page, instead of www.BMW.com, perhaps. Of course, if anyone ever discovered it, they'd know, without a doubt, that I was the one who did it. That's the one reason why I'd feel bad about leaving this job, without me, who'd be there pester everyone about progressive politics?

Seth suggests a tinfoil hat might help

So , I had an incredibly productive weekend, despite finally having to come to terms with the fact that Jason is never going to want me. Yes folks, Turil has finally gotten a clue. (Is that cheering I hear in the back there?)

Anyway, I forced myself to try and finish up the zine, and I impressed myself with the results. I'm 80% there, and it looks damned good, if I say so myself. I've had to significantly pare down the amount of stuff I had collected for the project. I barely had any room for artwork, so I guess it's ok that I didn't really have much to begin with. Though, I did find a photographer who has some excellent stuff, and he was overjoyed to have some of his work included. So, another night or two and I should have the thing done. I'm already thinking about doing another one, but that will all depend on my finances. (Anyone know of someone who might want to be my benefactor...)

By the way, if anyone is in the Boston area, this Saturday Ralph Nader is appearing at a rally/concert at the Orpheum. Comedian Barry Crimmins is the emcee, and Patty Smith will be playing, too.

It's nothing amazing, but this article is kind of entertaining. It reminded me about the news story about someone sending Bill Clinton a vial of Salmonella. Lightweights. If they were really serious about making the man ill, they should have sent him an undercooked McDonalds' Big Mac. If the salmonella didn't get him at least the cholesterol would.

I got my stickers today. Decided to go with the more positive "Peace is Patriotic" instead of the "War=Terrorism" that I'd originally planned. So if anyone wants some stickers (I think I have 200) to put up, let me know. I'm thinking of selling some of them to raise money to donate to Amnesty International. Or maybe just use the cash to help print the zine when it comes out.

The guy who stars in the new Richard Linklater film is also the guy who animated it. Odd. In an interview, he mentions that it's one thing to draw a self portrait, and an entirely different thing to do 8000 of them.

monarchy

We no longer live in a democratic society. The US is about to be officially taken over by King George W. There is no longer any need for Congress, nor for the Supreme Court. What's so fucked up is that the flag-waving Bush supporters are calling people like ME naive. Now I'm not so sure that Texas is large enough to hold all of these lunkheads. I'm thinking that we might need to give them a bunch of those other states down there, too. Florida, to start with (after we relocate NASA, of course). And how ever many more it takes to keep them happily penned. We can probably get Norway to send over a few hundred sheep herders to keep them all from chewing their own tails off.

On a more positive note, I finally received my Josh Simpson planet (which I got as a gift for donating a buttload of money to Public Television). I'm thinking that it might be a nice place to live if the Earth doesn't work out.

petty officer second class

I can't say enough good things about SCUL, and their fearless leader Skunk. Their basic motto is to have more even fun on bikes than they did as kids. It doesn't always happen, by they never give up trying. The world could use more people like these. The Halloween ride is their season finale, and everyone is invited to participate, even civillians, as long as they've got a costume. The War on Terrorism Costume was a big hit once again. The Fish Bike was there as an ambassador from Bikes Not Bombs. Jef did, indeed, come with me, and had a grand time. He was inducted with the SCUL name Cockroach, and was spoken highly of by Fleet Admiral Skunk, who had apparently been trying for quite some time to get Jef to join.

Finally, I need to mention DangerMouse. She is, quite arguably, the most adorable person ever. Certainly the most adorable person in SCUL. I have no pictures of her, so you're just going to trust me on this one. She's not only adorable, but the sweetest person, too. And she rides a chopper. If I was gay, I'd be in love.

Critical Mass in disguise

The War on Terrorism costume was a big hit on the Critical Mass bike ride last night. Some of the elements of the costume included: Giant pink foam Jiggly Puff outfit, zombie makeup, a plastic skull sword with an American flag hanging from the blade, and a gorgeous pink kid's bike with fake flowers on the front and an inflatable Earth suspended off of the rear. (The gist of the costume was that it made no sense, get it?) The ride was fun, though short. Highlights of the evening were two CARS getting involved in an accident because neither had the patience to wait 30 seconds for us to pass, and responding to a couple of BU geniuses who were yelling "You suck!" by chanting "USA! USA!" Oh, and Dan the Bagleman (from Food Not Bombs) joined the ride for the first time ever. About 12 of us ended up at a tiny Indian restaraunt in Central Square in Cambridge. Pictures should be forthcoming...

Tonight is the big SCUL haloween ride. Same costume, different group of people. Should be even more fun. (Especially without a certain grumpy individual.) I've actually managed to convince Jef to come. And possibly a roommate or two. Yay.

So, you're probably saying to yourself, how's the Zine/Newspaper thing going, turtle? We'll it's going pretty well. I've got a preliminary layout, title, and lots of writen material that needs to be edited. I still need artwork, though. And some time to actually get the thing all together. But things are moving along.

In the meantime, check out my letter to the editor that's in the Boston Phoenix this week. It's the first letter in the section (for some reason they left out the names in the web version, though I'm fully credited in the real paper).

bad timing once again

Last night I spent a couple of hours making up a card for Jason to explain my thoughts about our "friendship". The downward spiral of our relationship came, once again, to a head this past weekend. So I made him a card to let him know how much I still cared for him, even though I realized that I could no longer be a part of his life.

I dropped off the card this afternoon. And now I discover that I seemed to have randomly picked a really bizarre day to do so. See, today was the day that he went to court to try and deal with getting official visitation rights to see his daughter. (Something he's been trying to do outside of court for years now.) Fortunately, it apparently went very well, and the court folks are on his side. I, of course, had no idea that he was going to do this today, but I do kinda feel bad about him coming home after all that mess to find my card.

Something about Texas

It's time for the state of Texas to sucede from the US. And to take George W. and the Supreme Court with it. Then the rest of us can go on trying to help people, rather than killing them.

News Briefing

Not much to report these days, as you can clearly see by one of the "Top Stories" on Boston.com today: Portland Bans Snakes from Public Places. Good to know that the government in Maine is busy defending the city from evil.

On a related note, I'm seriously considering producing a one-off zine/newspaper dedicated to alerting the general public to the news that mainstream media, like the New York Times, doesn't see fit to print. If anyone would like to contribute to this project, please get in touch with me. (My e-mail address is on the left.) I'm particularly interested in realistic analysis, personal stories, and art reflecting on the "war on terrorism" and its accompanying dangers. I'd like to keep the tone positive, and avoid namecalling, pointless rants, and so on. There are plently of places for that kind of thing (this journal being one!), but not too many places focusing on where to go from here. The most popular question coming from the flag-waving crowd is "Well then, hippy, what do YOU propose we do?" I say, lets tell them what we'd like to do.

no soup for you!

At least no soup that has hemp oil or seeds in it. In an act that was completely lost on all of the mainstream media, the DEA has made it illegal to sell food products, in the US, which contain hemp. They are, of course, ignoring the scientific fact that you cannot possibly get even the slightest bit high off of hemp. And, even if you managed to sneak in some marijauana in the place of the hemp, according to the US government's own studies, getting high isn't in the least bit dangerous. (Smoking it is bad for your lungs though.)

So, yeah, stock up on those hemp seeds and oil while the stores still have them (retailers have 120 days to get rid of their current stock). Hemp seeds are one of the most nutritious foods available, and taste pretty good too. And, while you're at it, let your elected officials know that they need to repeal this law.

bug up your butt?

There is an excellent article by the writer Barbara Kingsolver on indymedia.org about her frustrations with the anti-democracy-flag-waving crowd, and how she deals with it all.

My mom has informed me that there seems to be a new variety of vicious ladybugs. Maybe that is why the world is being so obnoxious, they've all got ladybugs biting their asses.

You know, I came to a conclusion just now. My depression has, at it's roots, the feeling that no one appreciates me. Makes sense, right? When you don't feel needed (or wanted, even) by the outside world, your mind just kind of starts believing it. For the past few weeks, on and off, I've been given the impression that I'm just not useful or appreciated by either the world in general, or the people who I considered friends (or work, for that matter). And it's particularly bad for people like me who live by the creed that you should care about others and do your best to have a positive impact while you're lingering about the planet. We bend over backwards trying to help people, and make a difference, blah, blah, blah. And when we get no response, or worse, people treating us like crap, then we have a potential to snap. Seeing that we're making someone, somewhere even the slightest bit happier is the only thing that keeps us "fighting the good fight" (as one of my exes used to say).

Take this as a lesson, kids. Don't take people for granted. We're all guilty of doing it. (Yep, even me). But some day you may look up and we won't be here any more. And that's really gonna suck. Because then the only people who will be around will be the people who don't give a shit.

I don't like Mondays.

Or maybe it's just that I don't like anything at all these days.

Busy weekend, though nothing terribly interesting really happened. Well, unless you count the fact that I am now on a speaking basis with Jason. Friday night we were supposed to go to see Janeane Garofalo at the Orpheum. It took 4 e-mails to convince Jason to go, and then when we got there we discovered that the show had mysteriously been cancelled. We still don't know why, and there we no signs or even employees at the theater. Weird. Anyway, I went back to Jason's house and proceeded to unload all the crap I'd been thinking all week. Basically, the stuff about how horribly he was treating someone he was claiming to be a good friend. And the usual about guys running away from relationships when they get scared. (The story of my life...) Anyway, we spent Saturday night and Sunday morning together, and despite him being grumpy for nearly all of the SCUL ride, we had a nice time.

As far as the world goes, it's still pretty damned stupid. George W. has sunk to unforeseen lows of intellect. "They must have not heard. There's no negotiations." Not only is he still completely unable to utter a proper english sentence, but, by refusing the Taliban's offer to hand over Osama bin Laden, he's basically telling them to "shut up and die". The man is like a kid in a candy store, and since he's got all the flag waving American sheep backing him, it looks like he's not gonna leave until all the sugar has been has been turned into shit.

lost in the translation?

I wonder how the phrase "cough him up" translates into Farsi...

Heroes come in small packages

Tonight I saw Howard Zinn (The People's History of the United States) give a lecture about the artist's role in politics. He'd never spoken about this topic before and I was honored to be there for it. The man is amazing. Even more amazing was the fact that I not only agreed with absolutely everything he had to say, but that I had pretty much already come to the same conclusions on my own. I'll have some more thoughts about his speech later on, no doubt. But I'll give you two of my favorite gems of the evening:

"The most patriotic thing you can do as an American citizen is to question your government."

"War IS terrorism"

Not many things can render me speechless

What do you say to a guy who considers proposing to you, and then actually breaks up with you a week later?

Not a damn thing.

proud to be a barbaric american?

Why is it that when terrorists are American citizens we prosecute them in the judicial system which was set up for just such purposes, but when terrorists are foreigners we resort to massacring an entire country?

If America treated itself the way we treat the rest of the world, we'd have bombed ourselves into oblivion long ago.

I found a great article on www.alternet.org that outlines one of the biggest problems with war protesters (myself, of course, being one of them). The author notes that simply complaining rarely ever has any lasting effect. And it's true. What we really need to do is to energize an effort to demand that our leaders take a good, honest look at ALL of the options available, not just the ones we've been using for the past 10,000 years. It's not too late to change tactics. We need to insist that our government start showing the rest of the world the same amount of respect that we expect for ourselves.

And the best way that we can change our courtry's politics is to start with ourselves. Be educated, be open, and most importantly, be outspoken. When asked what the average person could do about the terrorist bombings, Jim Hightower had one thing to say: Talk to anyone and everyone. Engage your co-workers, friends, and relatives in a frank, yet friendly, conversation about how we could better approach this difficult situation. Everyone already knows that we want peace, but very few people honestly realize that there are, in fact, options that will actually allow it. As the saying goes "war is the result of a lack of imagination".

People also need to know that there already is a judicial system set up to deal with international crimes. And the events of 9/11 are exactly why this kind of world court exists. We need to ask ourselves, and our leaders, why we are not persuing the terrorists of 9/11 in the same manner that we persued the terrorists of 4/19 (Oklahoma City).

We need everyone to be fully aware that both justice AND peace are possible.

So, I can't quite decide which one of these suggestions to go with:

The ultimate solution

or this,

Hold on to what is good
even if it is a handful of earth.
Hold on to what you believe
even if it is a tree which stands
by itself.
Hold onto what you must do
even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life
even when it is easier letting go.
Hold on to my hand
even when I have gone away
from you.
— Native American Prayer

Just when I thought life couldn't get any worse. Honestly. How much more fucked up can it get?

None of this is helped by the fact that my boyfriend blew me off all Saturday. (And then broke up with me later on Sunday morning...)

Depression comes for a visit

I hate this world right now. I seem to have gotten myself deep into my old friend depression. I don't think I've felt this bad in many years. It's a combination of uselessness, hopelessness, and loneliness. And that's a lot of nesses.

Luckily for me I've been here before, and I know what the deal is. As someone recently pointed out I'm a very patient person. I suppose it comes from having an alcoholic and violent mom and stepfather when I was a kid. I must have learned that I could just wait and eventually things would stop being so utterly terrifying.

Actually, that's a pretty good definition of depression. Terror. But not of anything physical. More of a mental thing. And more of a creeping type of terror. That's what makes it so fucked up. Feeling terrified in the face of immenent danger is explainable and even expected. But terror when things look, for all intents and purposes, A ok, is percieved as abnormal. This kind of terror is built up while you're not really noticing. Just by the accumulation of everyday things continuing to go wrong. And then, when the proverbial last straw breaks it's just like BANG. The feeling that nothing ever is going to go right again. The feeling that the world is so irreparably screwed up that there really is no point to continuing.

Many folks seem to think that depression is a chemical imbalance, and is a disease. But I don't buy it. Many years ago I read an article in Adbusters magazine that argued essentially that depression was merely the reaction of compassionate people to an uncompassionate world. And that seems like a much more logical and rational explanation.

One of the main inspirations for me doing this journal was becuse of the recent terrorist actions against our previously complacent country. So, I'm going to start with a little of my own personal reactions.

Obviously, everyone in the entire country has been affected by the events of 9/11. The interesting thing to observe is the different ways in which people have changed. Some people have gone out and bought up all the Made-in-China American flags they could find and draped them out their windows in a most unceremonious manner, in an attempt to show the world how proud they are to live in the biggest superpower on the planet. Other people have gone out and donated blood or $20 to the Red Cross and gone on with their lives.

Me? I have been having reoccuring attacks of why the heck am I working for a pro-automobile company when I should be doing something positive with my work. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy the company I work for, the people are really great and they are even surprisingly openminded and socially aware. But, making books about cars is not at all what I want to be spending my life doing. As a matter of fact, this is one of the only jobs I've ever had that wasn't at a non-profit. I just got comfortable with the luxury of it all, you know, of being able to pay most of my bills, and by some nice things for a change. But that's not what it's all about. Early on I realized that my reason for living (my "religious philosophy" if you like) was to make a positive impact on the world. To make the world a better place, cliche as it may be. And these recent events have simply reminded me of that philosophy.

Sounds great, right? But my problem now is that I haven't been able to find any kind of job that is even moderately appropriate for me. I sit there and look at all of the so called non-profit jobs on Monster.com and I see nothing. Not a damn thing that would be beneficial to anyone, human or otherwise. And then I realize that, in this world, people who do good are rarely paid for it.

It depresses the fuck out of me.

Opera and Blogger don't seem to be getting along terribly well. But it's cool. I'll just use Netscape for now. Expect a lot of random changes in the design of this thing in the next week or two.

Anyway, welcome to my blog. I still prefer the term journal, since that's really what this is, to me. Log sounds so impersonal. You know, like on Star Trek, the Ship's Log?

So, if anyone is actually reading this, you have Jason to thank (or blame) for me starting one of these things.

I'll put up a brief history of Turil soon, so that any people who don't already know where I'm coming from will have some clue as to why I am the way I am. And all that crap. But for now, you'll just have to read my little non-sequitors and other random turtleness.

Thanks for your patience. And thank you for using AT&T.

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Welcome to my blog.